Bulletin Article July 2024

Strategicresourcetraining   -  

by Natalie Holmyard

Are We Playing It Forward?

What an interesting 2 months it has been conversationally with so many of our beloved SRT community – including our family.  Nothing stirs up defensiveness in the flesh like the suggestion of it harbouring bitterness and unforgiveness.   Anecdotes of church camp “healing weekends” and “deliverance vigils” sound like we all have this “forgiveness thing” sorted out in our lives and there is no way a bitter root could possibly dwell inside of us……

What I know to be true is that the opportunity to work through forgiveness is a daily occurrence in my own life.  The remarkable thing is – unforgiveness and the possibility of bitterness do not take long to rear their ugly head – and I am required to practice Thursday and Friday’s prayers diligently most days!  This practice has become part of my daily spiritual routine.  It is something I hope I have a level of mastery in – but I also know it is something I will continue to grow and transform in, till I draw my last breath.

I know that we have talked about (at length) the mental movie loops and how replaying certain past situations, conversations, events etc, can truly reveal to our spirit – where unforgiveness dwells.  However, have we considered that mental movie loops can also happen when we begin to imagine what MAY happen, what MAY be said, how we MAY feel when we engage with a particular person or situation?

I have found this to be true for me and so many others that I work with, when conflict resolution is not properly executed and when time lingers between past offences and the next encounter with people or situations.  These “pay it forward” mental movie loops allow our flesh to rule our thoughts and emotions and also give a foothold to the enemy.  We come to believe that our bitterness and resentment is justified, and our personal right.  

Instead of allowing the Holy Spirit to lead us into forgiveness and His fruits, our hearts harden, and we can portray a myriad of fleshly responses.  Worse still, we internally separate our hearts from the love of Father, relationally. Disobedience is never our friend – no matter how much it seduces us. 

Every day I am reminded of the scripture in Matthew 7:3-5. “Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?  Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and look, the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye!”
That log in my own eye, in your eye, in our eye, is our unforgiveness, our justification, our resentment, our bitterness, our self-righteousness, our ego, our disobedience, our pride, our flesh, our orphan self. 
 
Before we can dare to imagine that we can rule – we must deal with this plank in our own eye, indeed, in our own heart. Before we can walk in the obedience of Godly and biblical judgement, we must become diligent in walking out daily, the constant rejection and accusation of bitterness against ourselves and others. Let us rush into confession, daily, hourly, minute by minute if needed.  This is my constant prayer for myself.  This is my constant prayer for you.
 
God bless you and keep you.
 
Natalie Holmyard